


Sixty-Two Confirmed Moons

by asequenceofbaddecisions



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Cutesy, Drabble, Drunk Scorpius, Fluff, Gen, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Spoilers, Hogwarts Fifth Year, One Shot, Post-Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, Quidditch Scorpius, Slytherin Scorpius Malfoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-08-22 02:23:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8269081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asequenceofbaddecisions/pseuds/asequenceofbaddecisions
Summary: When Scorpius celebrates a Quidditch win with the Gryffindors a little too hard, Albus is forced to come to the rescue... at 1 AM. (General fluffiness, just my babies being adorable, drunk!Scorpius)





	

“ _Albuuuuuuuus_ …” A whinge echoed from the cool night outside the doors of the castle. After searching the higher floors for what felt like hours, and coming across a few unhelpful ghosts, Albus had finally reached the first floor. As he entered the darkened courtyard he sped up his walk, following the moan to large balcony set back from the main archways. Slumped against the stone balustrade was a hunched blond figure giggling softly to itself.

“Scorpius?” Albus muffled a snort when his friend yelled and jumped violently with surprise. “Shh, you’ll wake the whole of the castle shouting that loud.” He plonked down next to his friend, who seemed to still be recovering from the shock. “What happened? I thought you’d only be a few minutes after the Quidditch game ended?” He furrowed his eyebrows. “How did you even get out here in the first place?”

Scorpius swung his head to stare at Albus’ nose, and a lazy smirk grew across his face. “Gryffindors… they are…” He hiccoughed twice, before pausing again.

“Go on.”

“Wha’?”

“Gryffindors are…?”

Scorpius’ eyes grew wide, “CRAZY!” He shrieked, “ _They’rethecraziesthouseofthemall_!” He descended into another fit of giggles, lolling his head to the side and repeatedly slapping his legs. This continued for a few minutes before the laughter died away, and Scorpius was left staring at the sky wistfully. The cool night breeze brushed through the courtyard, making Albus pull his robes tighter. “Did you know Saturn has 62 confirmed moons?” Scorpius whispered, “And _I’m_ one of them?”

“Malfoy,” Albus snickered, “What are you on about?”

“It’s true!” Scorpius turned to his friend, “Hyperion was the _eighth_ moon discovered! I’m a _moon_ , Albus! A _moon_!” He rolled back towards the sky, muttering ‘Scorpius _Hyperion_ Malfoy’ to himself.

“I think you’ve been drinking something other than Pumpkin Juice tonight, mate,” he chuckled, “We need to get you back to bed.”

Scorpius twisted around and buried his head into his friend’s shoulder. “Mnph…noooo…”

“Scorp, it’s freezing, you’ll catch a cold—”

“ _Nooooooo_ …” he whined, “I don’t want to _mooooove_ …” There was a moment of stillness. “The Scorpion King is too powerful for mere _mortal_ inflictions like _colds_.”

“If a teacher catches us out here we’ll be done for,” Scorpius groaned again, “We’re already permanently in detention, McGonagall will probably transfigure us into cats as the only other suitable punishment.”

There was another pause, before Scorpius let out a few giggles, then a few more, before suddenly he was convulsing with laughter as Albus tried to quiet him down again.

“Shut up! Shh! I’m not _that_ funny!” This only sent Scorpius into another fit of shrieks, this one even harder to come down from. “Right, that’s it, we’re going _right now_.” Albus hopped up, and Scorpius rolled to the floor, creasing over and clamping a hand over his mouth to suppress his howls. “Oh, come _on_ ,” He muttered to himself, flapping his arms in exasperation. He crouched down to the shuddering figure on the floor, waited a second, then whispered ‘There’s a test in Potions tomorrow that you haven’t studied for’.

This sobered Scorpius immediately, as he shot upright, his eyes wide. “No…” he whispered in disbelief.

Albus stood up and smirked, “No, there isn’t, I just wanted to get you moving.” He dodged a sloppy punch to the arm from the disgruntled blond on the floor and chuckled. “Now _please_ , can we go?”

Scorpius rolled his eyes and dramatically threw up an arm for his friend to take. “ _Fiiiiine_ …” Albus hauled him up, huffing slightly from the effort. Scorpius slung an arm over his friend’s shoulder and attempted to move forwards, but only managed a few unsteady steps before flopping downwards again.

“You’re really not helping, Scorp,” Albus grunted painfully. He was certainly not the strongest student in the school, so supporting the dead weight of his roommate was a challenge. He sighed, before starting down the corridor, Scorpius’ feet dragging behind. They walked in silence for a moment.

“ _You’reagoodpersonAlbus_.”

Their footsteps echoed through the vaulted arches as Albus shifted his grip.

“What?”

“I said, you’re a good _person_ , Albus.”

There was a pause.

“Um, thanks?”

Scorpius turned and half-smiled, moonlight gracing his features

“And you’re a good friend.”

Albus smiled softly.

“Thank you.”

“ _You’rewelcome_.”

As the duo ducked through the entrance to the castle, they heard footsteps approaching. Albus dived behind a statue, pulling Scorpius with him, who plonked down in a rather undignified manner. Albus put a finger to his lips, before peeking around the edge of their hiding spot in an attempt to spy who was passing, but the dim torchlight of the castle at night made it difficult to see.

“Okay, so if we get caught, we’re going to need a reason as to why we’re behind a statue at 1 o’clock in the morning—” Scorpius whispered loudly. Albus whipped around sharply and clamped a hand across his friend’s mouth. He placed the finger to his lips again as the footsteps neared, then passed, and he slowly lowered both hands.

“All we need to do,” Albus whispered cautiously, “Is make it down the stairs, down the corridor, and into the common room without being caught. Then you can talk, okay?” Scorpius nodded, looking a little wary of irritating his friend again. “Let’s go.”

Albus stood up slowly, grabbing his friend’s wrist and dragging him along behind. He moved swiftly, keeping as close to the walls as possible. Scorpius, however, stumbled a little, not completely rid of the firewhiskey in his system. “All I was going to suggest,” he grumbled, “Is that I got lost coming back from my Runes lesson.”

Albus snorted, but kept up his pace. “Scorp, don’t you think any teacher is going to realise that we’ve been attending this school for five years, and that we shouldn’t get lost anymore?”

“Hey, I didn’t even know we had a separate Divination tower until last week!” he exclaimed, tripping on an uneven flagstone, “There are so many bloody towers they all just, kind of, blend into one…”

The pair reached the top of the stairs leading to the dungeons and started to make their way down, Albus still yanking his friend from ahead. Scorpius, however, was waving to a rather disgruntled painting, and did not expect the sudden drop of the step. This sent him tumbling downwards, yelling a few choice curses as he rolled.

“Scorp—Shh – Scorpius!” Albus raced down the stairs as Scorpius ground to a halt. “Are you alright?” His concerns were drowned by a cry of ‘Merlin’s left saggy—’ as he knelt next to his friend. “Are you hurt? Because going to Madame Pomfrey at this hour would probably look really—”

“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” Scorpius groaned, clutching his head, “Son of a Banshee, that was _wild_!” he exclaimed.

Both boys giggled at each other, but immediately froze at the sound of chuckling from the top of the stairs. They slowly swivelled, recoiling in horror when they saw Professor Longbottom in his dressing gown laughing happily at a dark rectangle in his hand.

“Professor?!”

“What are you two doing out of bed?”

There was a pause as the boy’s minds continued to process what was happening.

“ _Igotlost_!” Scorpius yelled, turning a deep shade of beetroot. “ _Runes a-and the… the Divination tower a-and…_ ” His brain whirred as he tried to think of another excuse. “ _Wasn’t Herbology great this week!_ ” He cried, imminently regretting his words and burying his face in his hands. Albus snorted with laughter, but received a clumsy whack to the thigh.

“Professor Longbottom… um, you see... Scorpius got a little… excited with the Gryffindors after Quidditch tonight.” Albus rubbed the back of his head in shame. “I had to come find him.”

Neville smiled knowingly, “Ah, yes, the big match. Remind him when he’s sober I thought his performance was spectacular tonight.” Scorpius grunted in thanks, still not moving from his shameful position.

“Er… thanks, Professor,” Albus said carefully, “Are we… in trouble?”

“I _should_ punish you boys for being out of bed,” he grinned, “But this video is going to be punishment enough when your fathers see it.” He looked excitedly at the screen in his hands before pushing it into his pocket.

“He _filmed_ us?” Scorpius whispered. “Oh my God, I’m never going to hear the end of it from Dad – firstly, I befriend _the spawn of Potter_ ,” he mimicked his father’s gravelly voice, “Secondly, I fail to show any attention for sports for the first fourteen years of my life, instead choosing to become King of the Nerds.” He flopped backwards onto the stone floor. “And _thirdly_ , I get filmed rolling down the stairs drunk by _Neville Longbottom_ – no disrespect, Sir, to be honest I’m just glad you’re alive and…” He trailed off when he noticed the teacher’s quirked eyebrow. “Sorry, Sir. I’ll stop talking now.”

“I think that would be smart.” He smirked slightly, before waving them away. “Go, I never saw you here. And in your next letter to your dad, Albus, tell him he has something to look forward to when we next meet. See you boys in Herbology next week.” He turned and walked back towards the staff dormitories, hands shoved deep in his pockets and humming quietly to himself.

“I think now would be a good time to go,” Albus mumbled, still slightly in shock.

“ _Yuuuup_.”

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic posted! Feel free to leave feedback :)


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